Swine flu BREAKOUT!

Imagine if I was the first Singaporean to be down with swine flu... Fret not, I am not down with the virus. But sometimes, I wished I did.

Soccer practice at Toa Payoh is the worst ever yesterday, we not against the toughest or the roughest opponents there. Instead, we were up against our own teammates. As usual, I started it, all the commotions and disputes, they were all started because of me. I blasted at Wei Qian for not playing well, shouting at Marcus' team when I did not know that they were actually sensitive to those shouts. Kok Chye got mad when I did not play the ball to him, Billy blasting me back for playing at my worst ever form, conceding 10 over goals through him.

We weren't physically rough, but mentally rough. Looks like after yesterday's practice, some might not even come back anymore. This is really dis-heartening, and damaging my team morale, especially when we have one big game at NUS tomorrow in the morning.

Today I received news that some of the volleyball teammates were banished to the beginner level when they actually trained so hard for the past few months. I am so pissed off at this piece of news. Firstly in that stupid cca, there isn't any adult or whatsoever coach to guide the entire team. It's totally run by a committee of jokes, and definitely not the type of people who makes good decisions. I will wait for the attachment to end, then I will make a comeback to the cca, the points don't matter much to me. I will strike back and bring justice to those affected teammates.

Playing sports is good, especially for team bonding(apparently my class don't even know how to kick a stupid ball). But it can also hurt the morale of one, which in turn can damage the entire team.

My temper is recently very short and hot, small little things can piss me off without myself noticing. I would just shout and make stupid comments or hurl vulgarities, and that's not the person I want to be. I need to sit down and make serious reflections on myself, not only in L4D but in football too.

Please Lord, help me get through this strong tide with you. Bring me to a place where I can feel peace and warmth. So that I can control my own temper, and in turn learn to encourage others.
Make me someone who would be humble, so that I would not be arrogant and shouting at others as if I am the best player in that court. Thank you...

Amen.